You’re Not Doing Boundaries Wrong—Pushback is a Sign You’re Doing it Right

So, you finally set a boundary.You said “no”.You asked for space.You stopped replying immediately.You let someone know what actually works for you.

And then - cue the pushback.

Maybe someone got annoyed. Maybe they questioned your decision. Maybe they flat-out ignored your boundary altogether.And now you’re second-guessing yourself.“Did I do it wrong?”, “Was I too harsh?”, “Should I have just said yes like I usually do?”

Here’s the truth no one tells you about setting boundaries:

Pushback isn’t proof that you’re doing it wrong - it’s a sign that you’re showing up differently.

Boundaries shift dynamics. And people notice.

When you’ve been the one who always says “yes”, the one who squeezes it in, stretches yourself thin, picks up the slack - suddenly choosing not to do that can feel like a shock to the system. Not just for you, but for the people around you.

This is the part where some people start testing you – “Will she really say no this time?”, “Or will she slip back into old patterns?”

They’re used to the version of you who overextends, who makes herself endlessly available, who doesn’t rock the boat.But here’s the thing: you’ve outgrown that version of yourself. And that growth? It can be uncomfortable.

Discomfort doesn’t mean danger.

When the pushback comes, notice what rises up in you.The guilt. The self-doubt. The urge to smooth things over.It’s totally normal to feel that discomfort - it’s your nervous system reacting to change, not a red flag that you’re being unreasonable.

In that moment, you have a choice:🩹 You can avoid the temporary discomfort by abandoning your boundary…⏳ Or you can sit with the discomfort, knowing it’s the cost of reclaiming your time, energy, and peace.

Yes, both are uncomfortable. But only one of them honours who you’re becoming.

You’re allowed to change the rules.

Setting boundaries doesn’t mean you’ve become cold, selfish, or “too much.”It means you’re no longer available for the things that drain you, diminish you, or distract you from what matters.

So if you're getting pushback right now, take a deep breath. You’re not doing it wrong. You’re doing something radically right.

Stick with it.Your future self—the one with more energy, more clarity, more freedom—will thank you.

🌿 Need support with setting (and sticking to) your boundaries?

You don’t have to figure it all out alone. If you’re ready to start showing up differently—without the guilt, people-pleasing, or burnout - I can help.

I offer 1:1 coaching for women who are ready to reclaim their time, energy, and confidence through boundary-setting and mindset shifts that actually stick.

✨ Book a coaching session with me HERE

Let’s work together to build boundaries that feel strong and self-honouring.